


How to save a Life

by PushingBackTheNight



Category: X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Erik Has Feelings, Hurt Charles, M/M, Oneshot, Prison, Songfic, X-Men Days of Future Past - Freeform, X-men First Class, blame, blowjob, break - Freeform, how to save a life, kind of pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-05 17:25:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16371929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PushingBackTheNight/pseuds/PushingBackTheNight
Summary: This work was originally posted on Fanfiktion.de in german. I hope I've translated it well :) It was one of my first storys in this fandom and my second oneshot xD I really like it, because I wanted to write a fic with the song "How to save a Life" from The Fray so badly and the "Ice Buckett Challenge for writers" gave me the best chance to bring my idea on paper :D I also think that this song is just perfect for the two of them x3Also as I'm always saying: English isn't my native language. So if you find any mistakes in the text, feel free to tell me, so I can change it :) thank you :3





	How to save a Life

**Author's Note:**

> This work was originally posted on Fanfiktion.de in german. I hope I've translated it well :) It was one of my first storys in this fandom and my second oneshot xD I really like it, because I wanted to write a fic with the song "How to save a Life" from The Fray so badly and the "Ice Buckett Challenge for writers" gave me the best chance to bring my idea on paper :D I also think that this song is just perfect for the two of them x3
> 
>  
> 
> Also as I'm always saying: English isn't my native language. So if you find any mistakes in the text, feel free to tell me, so I can change it :) thank you :3

"We need to talk."

It all started with these words. They had been the first step to the end. Charles had sent them to him, before he arrived at the front door. Erik wanted, but couldn't ignore them. So he turned and walked to the telepath's room.

Charles was sitting on the edge of his desk, like last night. The only difference was, that today he wore a shirt and pants and not a tight jogging suit. Erik didn't want to be there, not with him, not after what had happened last night. Charles would be able to change his mind. But he wasn't allowed to stay there. If he did, Charles would sooner or later lose himself. Without a word Erik turned away again and stepped out into the corridor. It had been a mistake to come here...

"Sit down, it's just a talk", sounded Charles' voice.

The pleading tone in his voice made him follow the request. Erik sat down in one of the chairs and looked at his friend. He couldn't allow Charles to develop feelings for him, especially not after last night. That would be the downfall of the younger man.

"What happened yesterday, Erik...I...It..."

"...should never have happened", he interrupted. "I should have never given in to you. But a bit alcohol can change a lot, right?"

He smiled pleasantly and met Charles gaze, who just stared through him.

"It was your idea to have a drink. Besides, you started it!", Charles shouted angrily.

"You are the more sensible of the two of us! You should have stopped when it was still possible!"

Charles walked around the room, then looked out the window to his right.

"Maybe I did not want that", he mumbled.

"You should have stopped it", Erik replied as angrily as Charles before.

Charles snorted.

"You came to your enjoyment, so why are _you_ angry? The only one who has the right to be so is me!"

"You are trying to say that I forced you to something? That I took advantage of you?"

"No, on the contrary! I enjoyed it, almost as much as you. I would never suggest that you would just use me."

"Then don't make such statements!"

With that, Erik passed him and wanted to go out the door again. He had already reached and opened it, when once again Charles' voice sounded behind him. What he said, was enough to make Erik freez.

"You wanted it too! You started with this! _I trusted you._ Now I know better. I thought you were different...I thought you would feel the same way."

These words had only one goal, to hurt Erik, because he had hurt him as well. His feelings...As he now said, that yesterday would have meant nothing. Charles wanted to lure him out of reserve. He should admit that his lack of interest was just played! Because Charles knew better. He had heard Eriks thoughts yesterday, when they were together. Erik had enjoyed it as much and he. Had the same feelings as the telepath.

"You can not admit your feelings, you can not put them into words. You still believe that there is nothing more than anger and hatred in you. You just don't allow anything else, although you know how much you would like it and feel good about these feelings! I know that you think you only punish yourself if you suppress it. The truth is, that you are also punishing and hurting others with that behavior. Right now, with your statement, you hurt me and you do not seem to care...Turn around and look me in the eye, when you say you do not care about last night."

Charles' voice was low and controlled. But Erik could hear the irritated undertone, the telepath thought he was hiding well enough. His words showed their effect, for although Erik didn't want to, he turned and looked Charles in the eyes. Another mistake. Tears had gathered in them. This wonderful blue shimmered through a veil of tears. That was more than Erik could endure! He _should_ tell Charles that this night meant nothing to him. He _should_ tell him that he didn't feel anything for him and should go. But he _couldn't_. He couldn't leave him like this.

Charles looked up when he heard a dull thump. Erik had dropped his bag and the next moment he stood in front of him. Charles looked up at him incredulously. His words had made a real impact. He wanted to make aerial leaps. For a moment, he had really believed that Erik would leave. He had doubted his feelings. Now Erik hugged him and held him close to his chest.

"It meant something to me, Charles. But...I can not...We can not..."

"Be together? Why not? Just tell me one reason!", cried Charles and wanted to free himself from the hug.

Erik didn't allow it. He even held him tighter. Charles could do what he wanted, the bigger one was just stronger. Charles didn't want to hear that they couldn't be together. Why shouldn't that work? They were two grown men. To whom were they accountable? If they loved each other, it was only the two of them that mattered.

"It wouldn't do you any good", Erik murmured, burying his face in Charles' hair.

"In which way?", he asked and gave up his resistance.

What was Erik talking about?

"I will not deviate from my goals and you will not deviate from yours. Sooner or later we will argue. Maybe just a bit in the beginning, maybe we'll just discuss it. But then the fight will get worse and at some point we will go separate ways. I will do things that you wouldn't understand, wouldn't tolerate. I couldn't bear to know that you hated me", explained Erik.

His voice was muffled by Charles' hair, but the younger one could understand everything and it didn't prevent him from laughing. Confusion spread in Erik and Charles could feel It. He pushed the younger away from him, so he could look questioningly at him.

"I'm sorry", said Charles, smiling apologetically. "Usually I'm the one who thinks up such scenarios, at least to that extent."

Erik shook his head and wanted to pull Charles back to him, but he had seized the opportunity and wound himself from his embrace. He took a step away from him and folded his arms across his chest.

"If you do not want me to feel something for you...or not more than I already do, then stop hugging me and just go. I can't bear it, if you do that while, at the same time, demanding that I should feel nothing. Especially because I can feel what you are feeling..."

Where Eriks voice had just been to loud, Charles' was to quiet. Erik could barely understand him and therefore asked again. Charles took a deep breath and looked Erik in the eyes.

"I know that you love me and I know that I love you. If you don't want those feelings to get even stronger, just go. But I think I know, that you can't."

"You're a know-it-all!", Erik growled obediently.

The next moment he sealed Charles lips with his and pressed the younger closer to him. It was like the night before. Suddenly, they both could only think of one thing. Erik urged Charles back to the desk, impatiently opening the buttons on his shirt. Charles had pulled Eriks sweater from his pants and was now breaking away from him to pull the disturbing garment over his head. While Erik also freed Charles from his shirt, he began to nibble on his earlobe at the same time.

Charles' hands wandered over the older one's back, down his spine, and slid under the waistband of his pants. Gasping, he cocked his head to one side as Eriks lips moved lower. A pleasant tingling spread in Charles. He got hot all the more, as Erik put a leg between his two. Eriks hands moved from Charles' hips to his bottom. As Charles suddenly bit him lightly in the soft spot between neck and shoulder, Eriks hands clawed into his bottom and pulled him closer to him. Another gasp escaped Charles and he rested his forehead against Eriks shoulder. His body was as sensitive to Erik as it was to nothing else and he wanted more. He made that clear to Erik, as he began to move his hip. Erik growled again and pushed Charles' upper body onto the desk.

"Do you trust me?", he asked, and Charles could hear the repressed arousal in his voice.

"Yes," he breathed heavily.

Yes, he trusted Erik, more than anyone else. If he didn't do that, he wouldn't have stopped him from drowning a few days ago. Although...he probably would have got him out of the water, but nothing more. He would never have taken him to the CIA or Westchester. He trusted him.

Erik leaned over him, kissing him, more passionately than before and even longer. But that was just a distraction. As he kissed Charles, he tied down his hands, to his left and right at the desk. For this he used the brass border of the table. A grin crossed his face, when he saw Charles' scared expression.

"You said you trust me", he simply said, leaning over the younger one again.

He moved his lips over his neck to his chest. He bit him lightly, teased him and Charles squirmed with pleasure. This was so different from last night. Yesterday, they had been drunk and he himself had taken most of the pick and hadn't even come to his own relief. Now he was completely powerless. He could do nothing, had to hand the control over to Erik.

The next moment his thoughts were successfully wiped out. He felt Erik move his lips over his penis and how he closed them around him. Charles moaned, threw his head back and lifted his pelvis in Eriks direction. He let him almost always slide out of his mouth, before he resumed him. Each time he tightened his lips around him. Then he let his teeth wander over his shaft and elicited another groan from Charles.

The younger one didn't know what to do. He wanted to bury his hands in Eriks hair and pull him closer. But this had been known to prevent successfully. Erik let his cock slide into his mouth faster and faster and felt that the younger didn't need much more time.

"Erik...ah...please, if you con...continue... then..."

Again gasps and groans escaped Charles lips, but louder this time. Erik raised his head and looked him in the eye.

"I would be offended if you didn't come", he said grinning, as he saw Charles blush.

Erik lowered his head once more and continued where he had left off. Charles felt Eriks lips, teeth and tongue. All this triggered a pleasant tingle in his abdomen. He bit his lip as he felt himself racing faster and faster to his climax. His orgasm was building up, like a wave threatening to devour him. The fact that he felt Eriks gaze on himself made things even more interesting and hotter.

"Erik..."

The taller man let his cock slide once more into his mouth and massaged it with his tongue. That was too much for Charles. He threw his head back and came with Eriks name on his lips and a hot moan. The wave washed over him and left him breathless.

The next thing Charles remembered, was Erik cleaning him up and putting his pants back on. The slight pressure on his wrists was gone and he could move his arms again. Slowly Charles straightened up and looked questioningly at the taller one.

"Why…?"

"Why did I let you have all the fun? I'd say we're even now", Erik smiled.

××××××××

That night, or rather this evening, was followed by more. But that didn't change the course of things. It came as I had prophesied. Charles and I argued, rarely at first, then more and more violently. But at that time I wasn't aware of any guilt.

I used the incident in Cuba to escape this vicious circle. After all, I didn't want Charles to break at some point, because of his love and our different opinions. But if I had known the consequences back then , I would never have taken that path.

Now I was trapped here, in this concrete and sand dungeon, under the Pentagon, unable to connect to my little telepath. From Emma, I learned that Charles had begun to drink and that he started to inject himself some crap. In the beginning, I didn't want to believe it. But after trying to reach him several times in vain and failing, I believed what she was telling me. If she could hear me down there, it would be a kid's game for Charles to do the same!

So I was all the more astonished when, two month after my arrest, a letter from Charles arrived and it was brought to me right away. His content was a mystery to me at the beginning, but the more I read through it, the clearer it became to me that it was a lyrics and that Charles referred to our situation...or rather his. The letter read:

Step one: you say we need to talk   
He walks, you say sit down, it's just a talk   
He smiles politely back to you,   
You stare politely right on through   
Some sort of window to your right   
As he goes left and you stay right   
Between the lines of fear and blame   
You begin to wonder why you came 

Where did I go wrong?   
I lost a friend   
Somewhere along in the bitterness   
And I would have stayed up with you all night   
Had I known how to save a life 

Let him know that you know best   
Cause after all you do know best   
Try to slip past his defense   
Without granting innocence   
Lay down a list of what is wrong   
The things you've told him all along   
And pray to God he hears you   
And pray to God he hears you 

Where did I go wrong?   
I lost a friend   
Somewhere along in the bitterness   
And I would have stayed up with you all night   
Had I known how to save a life 

As he begins to raise his voice   
You lower yours and grant him one last choice   
Drive until you lose the road   
Or brake with the ones you've followed   
He will do one of two things   
He will admit to everything   
Or he'll say he's just not the same   
And you'll begin to wonder why you came 

Where did I go wrong?   
I lost a friend   
Somewhere along in the bitterness   
And I would have stayed up with you all night   
Had I known how to save a life

 

It just wasn't clear to me that he meant my life with "Had I known how to save a life". I thought he would mean his or the president's, until he told me the truth the moment I last saw him for a long time...When I left the square in front of the white house, to lick my wounds. At first I was tempted to turn back. But then I realized that everything would start again if I would do so. One had seen what had happened last time. I had to stay away from Charles if I didn't want to hurt him again...


End file.
